Brother sent me back to residential college in the afternoon. we went shopping for a printer before that though. it's so awkward. i could feel the tense with him around. it's kind of hard for us to communicate because we havent have any of decent, easy-going conversations for years. duh. nonetheless, i am very grateful and enjoy his company. i always think of my Brother as someone awesome and handsome. he knew the ways around and helped me set up everything and i just feel so blessed. it's enough for me i guess.
Gee. i miss home. i miss Mother. i miss Father. i didn't even feel any sadness when they left a couple of days ago because i was like so darn sleepy and i believe that somewhere down my heart, i was whispering that they should have left faster because i so want to get to bed after the goodbye and all. gee. what was i doing? now, i miss them dearly. is it because i am already used to the life here, left abandon, independent and all? i remember that i cried so hard when i was about to left for university. maybe, my tears reservoir had dried up since then.
i have so much of things in my mind. i dont know how to begin everything again. my life. my life as a blur, ignorant medical student. i wonder how should i face the people around me. wy do i have an odd feeling that people see through my soul. it's so freaking scary. it's like i did something wrong and they knew every single bit of it. gee. what was i thinking.
2 weeks. 2 months. is all it takes to turn my life an upside-down. i dont even want to know who i am anymore.
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