Second Chapter

'Sometimes life hits you in the head with a brick. Don't lose faith. I'm convinced that the only things that kept me going was that i love what i did. You've got to find what you love. And that is as true for works as it is for your lovers. Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. and the only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven't found it yet, keep looking. Don't settle. As with all matters of the heart, you will know when you find it.' yes, i fervently hope that i will really love what i am going to do in future. again, the same doubts haunting. the minute i rise from my slumber and it goes on till i doze off again. sometimes, i go thru my day as just a routine. just for the sake of living, surviving. a life without expectation, without goal, without motive and driving force. it gets weird when i lost myself, stuck in that moment and have to talk to myself to be a better me instead of dragging just another day, for the sake of living, without any significant achievement.

and my resolution of the year is to just get thru this year without much trials and tribulations. of course they are indispensable part of life but is it too much to pray that they're cut off to it's lowest limits because my fragile self is not able to withstand much pressure and misery from it. to make myself feel better, i actually make myself believe that there's balance in each individual. there are always things to compensate for your lost and of course you have to give in to gain. as i always wish that i could have everything laid out perfect for me and grump at the thought and sight that they have what i have been yearning for, i was blinded because that was only a part of the story. i didn't realize what they missed, what they suffered thru, what they lost because God is great and He makes us equal. you cant have everything at once.